“25 and single” in pakistan

I got a text today. Iqra, my on/off bestie, is getting married on January 10th 2015.

And I’m depressed. Not that I don’t want to see her happy. It’s not that. I am actually SO happy for her. So happy.  To me, she is my BFF, no matter how many fights we have. And I never want to see her sad. Ever. I hope she gets everything she ever wished in life. ٓAmen.

Anyway. Back to me. I’m depressed because of many things. The major one is that I’m the remaining single friend in our group. Then, there’s the dread that I’m feeling. Because once my family finds out the news of Iqra’s wedding, MY life would be hell.

"Haw, Iqra is getting married, then why isn't Mahrukh? 
Not even engaged, tch tch tch. Must be her dark skin. 
Everybody wants a fair-skinned daughter-in-law and wife.
Nobody wants to marry a black girl. Or it must be growing age. 
25 is old. 25 is the end of the world. 
She will get no good proposals. 
Once she crosses 25, only widowers, poor, and fat men will be 
interested in her then. 
Why, God, why? 
What sins have we done to deserve this kind of punishment?"

This is what I have to hear. Every day. Every hour. Every minute.

Is age just a number? Heck, no, it isn’t.

Pakistani societies are very weird. They’re broken up into three parts: the extremely conservatives; the moderates; and the liberals.

My family falls in the second one. But. In some ways, they fall into the first category. Which sucks, big time.

The rest of the society falls into the first category, though. Well, only the society surrounding us, that is. Idk. An unmarried or a single girl in her twenties is an abomination for them. Most families do not want to bring home girls who are above the age of 24. Because according to them, “girls who are older tend to have their personalities set in stone, and their minds and thoughts and feelings developed and then, the mother-in-law or the family can’t mould the girl into whatever they want her to be.”

Basically, this means that the girl over 24 will not stand any bullshit coming her way from her in-laws. She will fight back. She will not let herself be their slave. And this is why society doesn’t want their sons get married to older girls. Their son will be nearing 40, but they will look for a “simple, family-oriented girl, in her late teens or early twenties” so they could brainwash her and use her as a doormat for the rest of their lives.

This is what our society is like. Backward, illiterate, stupid. Incredibly stupid.


4 thoughts on ““25 and single” in pakistan

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